Warning: Rough Times Ahead
Been a long time since I wrote anything, I just haven’t really been in a blogging mood, I am struggling and it sucks. I finally got the whole move thing squared away, we got out of the old apartment though it was a fight to do it, move day was hell, a couple of people bailed, there was a ton of drama and it was just ridiculous. It took pretty much the entire week that we had left at the old apartment to get it all cleared out and a lot of help from friends. There were some stressful days, long nights with a little bit of hanging out mixed in. We had some friends show up who saved the day and helped with everything and had they not it probably would have gone very badly. I thought that I was going to end up getting charged by the old apartment for general damage, my cats ripped up some carpet and the blinds but I actually ended up getting like $2 back…not much but I am happy I got anything back. They charged us for some random things that I think are BS, apparently the fridge needed a new shelf for some strange reason and I think they charged us for a new door somewhere, I’m not sure why but that is what the deposit was for.
Work is a fight, I thought I was doing well and at least on track but apparently I fell behind somewhere and didn’t notice. I had a really rough week back and forth with my supervisor but I think I am finally doing ok. I have been busting my ass for a while and I am hoping that means good things. Of course none of that really matters if I can’t pass my PT test which I am really worried about. I thought I was ok for a while but then everyone started telling me my push ups werent low enough and if I can’t get the minimum number required going down far enough then I flat out fail and that really worries me. Failing a PT test could ruin everything and so I am really nervous. I am trying to get it covered and taken care of but my test is coming up really soon and I am just not sure. I will just have to keep working as hard as I can and hopefully it all comes together for me.
I have a bunch of other crap going on in my life but that just isn’t worth putting on here. Generally life is really sucking right now but I am trying to get it back together and going where it needs to again. Everyone out there should wish me luck, I think I have a lot of tough times coming up…
Bummer…
Blarg! My diet has gone to hell…as of today I am 142 but I think a lot of that comes from all of the freaking salt I had yesterday. I can make a bunch of excuses but in the end I apparently lack will power. It started in Cali, I postponed everything and gave in to the cravings and then I was doomed, it all tasted sooo good…bad, bad me. I am trying to get back on track but it isn’t easy by any means. Hopefully some water weight drops off and I will at least be back to under 140 again, I think if I get that back I will be more motivated because I wouldn’t want to get back up to the 140′s again…if it isn’t water weight I will be kind of really disappointed in myself, I guess we will see in a few days and for now I will be trying to eat well again.
Florida is a no go, I am really bummed about that, I was so excited by the idea. Oh well, however many more years here and then hopefully moving somewhere awesome. At least now I don’t need to save up for a move which is probably really good for us. Maybe when I have everything in line with finances and everything I will miraculously get orders and all will be happiness. We need to get the car paid off and then hopefully from there we can move to another apartment that we like better and then maybe buy a second car, all are the most immediate goals and without worrying about a move it just means we get to them quicker. It also means that I can use my leave however I want which is nice and I really should probably put in more time exploring this area, it’s nice and I am sure there is fun stuff to do so I will make the best of it…I’m still pretty bummed though.
Other than that work is just the same as always, slowly trudging along. I think I may in the wrong section, I feel like I don’t learn anything in training and I probably don’t, I deal with excel spreadsheets and scheduling people. I think I should be dealing with the equipment more, I should be doing things more hands on so I can learn it all better. I had to mess with some equipment a bit today, it was one of our easier pieces and I still wasn’t entirely sure what I was doing, it was pretty sad. So I guess now I should try to make a bit more of an effort to play with equipment, it is time for me to start breaking out of the box and taking things into my own hands. I don’t know if it will actually happen, everyone is all over the place so who knows if I will have time or even motivation but we will see.
possibilities…
Wow, I didn’t realize it had been so long since I had posted a blog.
Life hasn’t changed much. Classes finish up this week so I am in process of trying to finish up all of my assignments. I procrastinated as I always do but luckily it isn’t so bad that I am completely overwhelmed. After I finish up with these classes I will probably take a break and hang out, read books and play video games. School can be fun when it interests you but for the moment I am really not interesting, the only thing right now that keeps me doing homework is the fact that I am not letting myself read or play games or any of that until it’s all done. Its a little motivation but apparently not enough, but I guess that is just how I am when it comes to school.
Work is work, I think I have come to realize I won’t get below the zone. I discovered one of the girls I will be up against and she is more well known in the squadron and I think has done a lot more than me. I’m ok with it, honestly I really wanted the money but our money should be pretty well settled after this next month and it won’t be as necessary as it was. I can probably stand to wait to get rank which will give me time an experience I need. I got an interesting call the other day from a guy in Florida who was looking for someone interested in swapping bases, turns out his wife is up in Washington and with her job can’t transfer down to him in Florida. He isn’t sure if there is really a chance, the swap program is technical not used anymore but he has talked to a higher up and I think because of the circumstances he is going to talk to people and see if something could be worked out, all they needed was someone from McChord who was interested in swapping. I told him I was very interested especially because he was offering to pay for the move (the down side of swaps is that the people swapping have to pay for their own moves). Florida I think would be amazing, and the base is just about right on the beach, back to sunny beaches if possible, nice. I am not getting my hopes up, honestly since the program is done I am thinking chances are slim but it is still a nice possibility, I know hubby would be happier there.
Oh so clever…
I actually did something computer related all by myself! I installed the router to make our internet actually wireless AND I even password protected it…all on my own! I am so proud, I know nothing about computers and it took me a while and the comcast person I talked to for assistance was stupid and left the chat before I was done but whatever “Oh the cleverness of me!” I am happy. I now have my computer back and all of my favorites and extra nifty stuff that is specific to my light and easy to use compy, I missed it. This happened a couple of days ago so admittedly I am late on the blog entry, it happens.
Work has been blah, up and down good and bad. I have actually felt somewhat useful work wise but I have also been getting a lot of homework done. That should tell you how bored I have been that I resorted to homework. On that note I am actually making some progress in my classes, not enough and I still have a lot of catching up to do but I am not as far behind as I was so yay! My art class is making me want to find my old sketchbook but sadly I have no idea where to even start looking for it. I think it may be lost in one of my book boxes and if that is the case it may never be found again…or at least until I get a bookshelf but I have so much other furniture that is priority over bookshelf. I need a dresser, dining room table etc…it will all come together eventually when I have money.
Hubby got switched shops and it looks like he will *finally* be making money. He kept getting screwed at the other shop but this one actually seems busy and even just in four days of this week he has made more hours than he did pretty much any week at his other shop. I am really hoping this time it actually works like we hope and plan and are told it will. We can definitely use the extra money and he can definitely use the happy boost he would get from actually having work and bringing in decent money. All around if this turns out better than it is win. He also has stumbled into a set schedule with this shop which I like, the only variable is which days he has off but the daily hours are the same.
Other than that not a whole lot, this is the quick bare basic run down because my eyes hurt from staring at the computer at work all day and I am tired of typing because of my homework. Excuses, excuses but that is the way of it lately. Anyways, tomorrow is hubby’s birthday so we are hoping for a fun night tomorrow night and then crashing out for the rest of the weekend then I go home next week! yay!
A Little Assistance Please?
ARG! Can someone get me out of this blah mood please? I am tired of this, no money sucks, having nothing to do sucks, this rain and gloom sucks…blah! I bought my plane ticket for my sisters graduation which is a yay but that isn’t actually happening until the end of May. I am as always tight on money but should hopefully at least keep out of negatives and I have at least finally gotten smart enough to have an account just for the stupid car payment so that money doesn’t get spent while waiting the ridiculously long amount of time it takes that man to cash a check. I am just grumpy and angry and have been feeling unhappy for the past few days and cannot get rid of the feeling. I don’t want to go to work and am dreaming of the weekend and yet not looking forward to it at all, the only thing I get is I don’t have to deal with work and even better is I can sleep as much as I want and as late as I want. Boo, blah and grrr…
Beautiful Sleep
Ah the weekend, beautiful…I love sleep…
So, I have been actually watching what I am eating and really working out trying to tone and lose weight for the past week. The result? I am down 1.3 pounds at least since this week started, a few pounds since I decided to generally get better by eating better. I am happy but I really want to actually be able to see it, in time I suppose I am just not a patient person at all. I have done P90X ab ripper every other day this week plus normal PT as well as a bit of Jillian Michaels so hopefully soon I will have the results I want.
Nothing much else going on, work is work, same old same old. Hubby and I are continuing on our way hopefully making the progress we need, fighting here and there as normal. Big boo of the moment I am absolutely completely beyond broke and it sucks. I want to go out and do stuff and have fun and maybe go out on dates with my husband so both of us can be happy rather than trapped in the apartment. The bar is fun but it can only be so entertaining for so long. He may be able to play pool for hours at a time and just hang out but me? Not so much. Anyway, I am hoping that within this next month it will work itself out but we will have to see. Hopefully by June at least I will have more free money because I won’t be trying to save for the graduation. Luckily things have worked out and I don’t have to try to get a hotel room which means I can maybe have a slightly longer less stressed stay. I do, however, have to buy plane tickets not to mention have extra money for food and whatever else I might need the money for. Into July things should be awesome for the most part, one major bill paid off which is extra money in my pocket as well as hubby’s so hopefully freedom to do fun things. I am hoping to maybe finally get some exploring done. Oh, and get some good groceries without having to worry about how much it costs, maybe I can afford to eat the good healthy food finally.
The blahs…
Bored! This weekend is just blah. I taught a class Saturday and so that means I should have a free comp day in my future but I don’t want to use it yet. That just messed up Saturday plus hubby and I got in a huge fight which kind of killed the rest of it. Today wasn’t too bad but just so blah. I don’t know, something is just off with me. I want to get out and do things, I want things to go back to happy I just want blah. I don’t even know anymore. Anybody have any tips to fix the blahs?
OUCH! Stupid husband…
Life, at this moment, is boring….and painful. I went to workout yesterday after having already done PT earlier and now I hurt, so sore. When hubby got home I asked him to crack my back and he got some amazing deep cracks. A little relief but overall, still sore, and I have to PT tomorrow and I am gonna let my supervisor kick my butt with a second workout round again. I am doomed, but hopefully it will be worth it…hopefully.
Hubby’s new job is so far good though I have found my issue with it, there always has to be one. Last night hubby didn’t get home until I was pretty much already in bed (I go to sleep early to be fair) and so we had no “us” time. Since this shop is supposed to be one of the biggest in the district it gets tons of work which means him being so late probably won’t be an entirely uncommon thing. It sucks especially because we won’t have weekends, he gets his days off during the week. I really hope they put him on opening shifts that way we will have some time together and the carpool will actually work out better. As it stands while he works I am carpooling with my supervisor which irritates me a bit. I asked many times if there was going to be an issue with him getting up early and making this all work carpooling and sharing one car and he said no problem, he was doing it while he was in Cali so he would be fine. Fail, he doesn’t want to have to wake up early when he works later so he wants me to get rides with my supervisor. Fine, except that means I kind of have to go do the workout thing with her and if she leaves late I have to leave late. I hate depending on other people for rides and stuff like that, it means if I am running late I screw them up too. Ugh, whatever, she is moving soon so I probably won’t be able to carpool then he has to suck it up.
