I have decided that this 6 months will be a time to improve myself and with that comes getting myself in shape…obviously that means working out.  I started out well went the first couple of weeks going everyday but about mid way through the second week I started having issues.  I was slowing down on the treadmill (a lot, it was really sad) and couldn’t make very good distance, my knees started to hurt like crazy and where my calf muscle meets my shin was in pretty large amounts of pain.  I think I have discovered that this is due to overpronation so I have gotten some cheap inserts as a temporary measure while I wait for the nicer ones to show up in the mail.  In the mean time the cheap ones have improved things a bit but I still haven’t managed to go running again.  Yesterday I got my butt beat by a Jillian Michaels DVD.  I like her, I think she gets results and she makes me laugh but I still don’t usually use DVD’s.  This one was a nice break though and I was falling out part way through and I knew I would be hurting but I had no idea how bad!  I could barely walk today my legs were hurting so bad!  So, needless to say that mixed with some time issues means I didn’t run or even hit the gym today.  I am not too stressed about it because normally I would take off the whole weekend and I ended up working out o Sunday so I guess today kind of makes up for it, I am just hoping I’m not as sore tomorrow and the inserts help me actually get some running.  My goals are to drop some weight, tone and most importantly just be set to do well on my PT tests…I think I can hit my minimum push ups but it is still a bit of a struggle so I need to work on those more.  I also need to obviously get the run down and then do some ab work.  I have been kind of up and down on my diet but mostly not bad enough that I would be over my daily burn so at the very least I wouldn’t gain any weight…now I just have to try to get to the gym tomorrow and see if I lost any.

If anyone has any tips and tricks for the gym I would love to hear!

I have a headache….verging on migraine I think.  I have no idea what is causing it…dehydration, lack of sleep, improper eating, stress…so many things to choose from, maybe a little bit of everything.  Hopefully it fades away soon and all can be good but who knows.  I have also noticed that today is going relatively slowly, it is sad, it would be nice if it went a bit faster or if hubby could actually be awake to get a little bit of quality time in but I won’t pester him.  I will try to make this recovery as easy for him as possible even if I had to deal with getting my teeth pulled alone…I think I am still bitter…

I need to get everything back on track.  I think I may have my money a little more on track than it was, I very possibly will end this month with a bit of extra cash but I think I will use whatever I have and put it toward that useless extra car payment.  Eventually we will get that stupid thing paid off and have a tiny bit of extra money.  My raises should kick in soon which will help, hubby is making more with the recent promotion so that will be awesome so with all of that, for once, money is actually kind of doing ok.  I need to get back on track with dieting and exercise, I still, for some reason, just can’t find the motivation for it.  I have been eating a bit better and that is at least a step but I am not doing as well as I should.  We keep getting caught with stress and not enough money because it costs a lot to eat healthy.  I need to figure out easy healthy recipes and cheap ways to shop. School is pretty much the last thing to get in line.  I am reaching the point where soon I may have to get into real classes which will be a bit more difficult.  Online classes are awesome because it works around your schedule but now I will have to work in full time work, a job and a real life….doable but not easy.  I also need to work in volunteer work and everything else I need to keep my career going strong.  Looking at what I have complete I should have my Associate’s Degree pretty soon, withing 2 or 3 classes maybe and from there I need to very quickly figure out my next step.  I am looking into commissioning and becoming an officer so obviously a Bachelor’s is required but the question is in what?  I want a degree I will have a use for but will also make it easy enough to commission.  I have an appointment for next week to talk to the education office and hopefully that will help me figure out what I am doing.  I also get to take a 3 hour placement test because I never transferred my AP test scores so I have to take math and English again but I can take some basic easy classes and it won’t be too bad, though I may just test out so I don’t have to mess with it at all.  Usually I like taking the classes, I get exposed to new, interesting books with English and generally enjoy classes a bit more, but I have taken these already so why repeat them?

A gift should be something that someone wants, not something you get because you are trying to avoid getting something they want because you see it as wrong for some reason.  In my position at the moment gift cards or cash are the best but if you want something really good for me, gift cards.  If I get cash I will spend it on bills or stuff not for me and won’t enjoy it, a gift card I am forced to spend on me and I can get any of the variety of things that I have been dreaming of getting forever.  I want something that lets me be irresponsible and doesn’t just sit on a shelf! I want to go to a spa or go shopping for clothes or go for a little weekend away or something!

Perhaps it is just me, and this is a slightly jumbled post, I am a bit grumpy but I really don’t see the big problem, can someone enlighten me?

I am getting so restless!  I want more money so I can do something, I want a new car, I want so many different things but I just can’t get them.  I hate being stuck and I always feel stuck.  It isn’t really anyone’s fault at the moment there is just so much stuff that has to be taken care of.  I am too freaking responsible, sometimes I wish I could just say screw it all and go have fun for a bit but I can’t.  I need some vent or way to release whatever this is, anyone have any advice for me?  At least I’m not sick anymore I guess..

I think I am maybe starting to get a bit better but it comes and goes so I have to wait and see.  Either way I have to get back to work tomorrow and hopefully be better because I won’t really have a real day off again until the 11th, gotta love the military.

I used to think I would make the military a career, I wanted to be in at least 20 years.  Once I got in I still thought that way, it was fun and structured and what I needed and wanted…at the time.  I am started to branch out now and thinking maybe I don’t want to do the full 20, maybe now I am capable of being on my own without the tons of structure.  I am starting to think of being a teacher again.  I had thought of it before and liked the idea but was never really sure but left the idea alone, now I am thinking it might be fun.  I have another four years to go on my enlistment which is fine, it’s a lot of time to think but now I am more open to branching out.  There are a lot of things to think about like job stability, insurance, where to live and all of the questions that are easily settled by just being in the military, maybe it is all stuff I just decided to avoid by joining the military, it was an easy answer when I couldn’t make any other decisions.  We will see how it goes but at least I am finally thinking about other things and I think I am going to start going to school again, not a lot all at once but start on it.

Funny how a couple days of being sick leads to some life decisions, this is what happens with so much time to think.  I am also leaning towards waiting on kids.  I *really* want them and my family and friends are pushing but I have only just recently hit actual happiness with my husband without all of the crazy stress and issues.  We still have stuff to work through but we have finally grown up and are just getting our money together and I want to enjoy it.  I will still give him the looks when we pass kids and poke and pester him but honestly, I think just not right now.  That also rolls into the potential teaching idea, I want to concentrate on school and setting up my life and though I may not be done with school by the time we have kids I want to at least get everything rolling first, get all of the bills paid off that we can and enjoy some time with just me and the hubby for a bit.  I can finally have the honeymoon period I never got, why should I try to cut it short?

I came home, passed out and woke up sick…I had a bit of a sore throat when I went to bed but I woke up pretty crappy feeling so I went to sick call.  Lucky me, doctor put me on quarters for 2 days.  This could be a good thing except we have an exercise coming up but I really hope I don’t mess anything up by being unable to go to work.  I wanted to get this sick feeling gone before the exercise which is why I didn’t even mess with it and just went to the doc but hopefully it doesn’t come around that it would have been a better option to just suck it up.

Other than that life is pretty good, money is (for now at least) doing better.  I ended the last month with a little extra and not having to balance money around, it was a very strange feeling.  I thought I had missed paying a bill or something and kept checking over and over but it was all paid and good.  It was surprising but worked out for the better because now I need a new power cord for my computer and I can actually afford to buy it!  Next I maybe will save enough to buy the external hard drive I want and save all my music and stuff to that.  It is nice to not have to freak about money so hopefully hubby’s work doesn’t mess with him anymore and we can finally get comfy and stable and out of debt.  I can’t wait to get the freaking car payments done.

I think for now that is it, my mind is just too jumbled to make sense of much right now so I am rambling…I think it is time for a nap…

It is that amazing time of year where the feeling of everything starts to change, the trees take on the colors of fire and their leaves fall like snow, the smell in the air is one of spices and autumn and the holidays are coming around.  We will have Halloween coming very soon with all of the childish fun and excitement it brings, kids dressed in cute little outfits, tons of candy, fun decorations and scary entertainment.  I have movies picked out on netflix set for a movie marathon should that be the choice for Halloween night or I may go to a party or out with friends, there are so many options.  Then there will be Thanksgiving, the first Thanksgiving with my husband in Washington as well as the first I can do anything.  Last year I had my wisdom teeth pulled the day before but this year our shop is thinking of getting together and having a shop Thanksgiving meal for those of us not going home.  A fun group gathering for our odd little family.  Then the smooth transition into the winter holidays, the subtle change of scents from cozy heavy smells you want to wrap yourself in and make you hungry to the wintery fresh scents that make you feel like you are walking through a pine forest or unwrap presents under the Christmas tree.  Christmas will be a wonderful experience I hope.  This will be one away from my family with just hubby and I creating our own traditions.  we can decorate our own tree and unwrap presents with just us on Christmas morning.  Family is always nice to have around but there is something to be said about a nice Christmas with just the hubby and I.  Can we all tell that I am excited for this time of year?  Summer used to be my favorite season but I think I have grown into a lover of fall and winter, I think I am equally in love with each.

I have been doing laundry on and off through out the day and cleaned up a bit here and there.  The house still looks cluttered and a bit messy and we still have boxes all around and have way too much stuff but we are finally making it a home.  It is really the little things that make somewhere a home, just small things probably different to each person that makes a place feel comfy and lived in.  Hopefully over the next bit of time we can sort the boxes, donate a bunch of stuff and really get everything settled. We are so close and that just adds to the awesome feeling.

We also had a minor epiphany not long ago.  It is something that we had vaguely realized before but it really hit home recently.  I was in Hawaii for just over a week and while I was there had no real reason to spend any money.  When I got home I realized just how much was left in my bank account and how much we screw around and waste money.  I got back and we could actually do things and have fun!  We went out yesterday to see Jo Koy perform because I found out the day of that he was in the area and actually had money for tickets.  We had the money to buy lights and a coffee table to help with our home, we could actually do what we wanted without being afraid that we couldn’t pay bills!  It is a great feeling and hopefully one that can keep up.  When we discovered how much extra there was we did the calculations and saw how much we could have, not enough to be rich by any means but enough for us young adults to live a life and enjoy it.  Now I am planning to settle in tonight and budget and hopefully get a lot of our old debts paid faster and get rid of them and still balance everything and have fun, that is the goal at least.  I think I will also start cooking a bit more at home, or maybe strike a deal with my husband, he cooks the 2 days he has off, I cook the 2 I have off and we can eat cheap food or leftovers the other three days.  With us living so close to work we are already saving a ton on gas, especially since he works really close to me so we have managed to cut down a decent amount of spending so far.  The whole idea of getting things paid off and potentially having money really makes me happy and excited and that excitement seemed to have finally hit my dear hubby.

Now we get to pack and go on to the next part of this adventure.  This afternoon we fly back to Oahu and then hopefully fully relax though I can almost guarantee that won’t be the case.  My mother is Matron of Honor in her friends wedding and I believe I will be roped into helping prepare.  I’m not looking forward to it but maybe it will be better than I think.

My sister is coming out in less than a week!  I am excited and so looking forward to it.  I need a break from life and this will hopefully be exactly what I need.  I feel bad because I can’t get days off from work but the reason is valid and I will explain it sometime later, whatever the case I have sadly limited how we can spend time here but my sister is awesome with finding stuff to do even in time limits so it will be great. We at least have some basic plans already set up, the fair, a free concert, I am sure she has found a bunch of other stuff.  It also kind of depends on the weather, she is excited for the rain but it can limit our options as far as stuff to do goes.  I am sure another cooking adventure will take place, I think there was a deal that this time she would cook for me and I will absolutely call her on since I love home cooked food but I hate the effort it requires.  I am a generally lazy person, I get bored with it but the output of energy usually just isn’t any fun.  Of course it always depends but my preferred thing to do is sit on the couch and watch movies or play games, things that don’t require much, its sad but true.  Anyway, sister’s visit…should be good fun my current challenge is to get that room straight (also made worse because of the washer situation), she says she would be good so long as there is a bed and a path to it but I really want to do better than that so I am trying.  I have made a decent amount of progress, at this point I can probably get the space for the bed and the path but I am trying to do more, it is not so easy, husband has a bunch of stuff that he *still* has not sorted even though he keeps telling me he will be getting it done.  I think I am just going to try to condense it down into the minimum number of boxes and just throw it somewhere…like at his head   We will see how it all goes I guess.